Don't Rape Me

Filming a video in an alley way in NYC is legal without a permit, as long as you are using a hand held camera, no tripod. More information on this video, TBD, but in the meantime, read about it here.

THREE FLY FLOPS TO CALL HOME

in the Lower East Side for $800 / month and under

These are some rooms for rent I found on Craigslist. You can thank me for doing the dirty digging for you by commenting and sharing this blog with your home slices. I will also accept pie.

THIS PLACE sounds okay, no pics, and the person sounds suspectingly like a hipster, but since 

when is that such a bad thing? Hipsters usually hang out with hot friends, have cool shoes and an endless supply of party invites and PBR. $800 / month, share, few blks south of Grand & few blocks east of Delancey. Highlights include a "big room" (that's open to interpretation) and smoking inside, if that's your thing. Also, a "down to earth" roomie (also open to interpretation). Lowlights: No couples, sounds like it could be in Alphabet City or the projects. But on the flip side, the proggies have elevators. 

I like to call this one TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. The photo looks great -- large bed (bring your black light to search for bugs, semen), desk AND A CHAIR - hello, mirror, this place looks like the kind of joint where Johnny Rotten killed Nancy Spungen. $450 a month, run don't walk. If you rent this place PLEASE send us a follow up. Was it real or did you find yourself in a car trunk and escape using only your wits and charm? 

ROOM #3 sounds reasonable, too. It's priced at $800 / month, high enough to keep out the rif-raf, but low enough to afford sans a trust fund. Pros: It's in Little Italy, a neighborhood which boasts Umbertos, La Mela, Spring Lounge, Rice To Riches, Wild Ginger (the list goes on and on) and finds itself sandwiched between Soho and the Lower East Side. There are decorative Christmas style lights that hover over the streets year round. Furnished. Cons: It could be a con. It appears to be a walk up. It appears to be short-term. There is little personal information about your would be roomie. Furnished. 

Happy house hunting and lotsa luck!

BIG FIRE LAST NIGHT in my hood

Last night I was cruisin' east on Delancey, riding my bike on the sidewalk which I know I'm not supposed to do, but it was about 2 am and there were no people around so I figured, well, I'm fairly drunk and it's probably just safer for everyone if I just ride on the sidewalk. 

I saw a literal parade fire trucks and lights parked around Broome and Christie, and thought, maybe they're making a movie or something? But then I saw a whole bunch more on the next block, around Forsythe and Christie, and then at the next block on Eldridge and Christie, and then Allen Street at Delancey was entirely blocked off, and then Orchard and Christie was full of cop cars and I knew something big was up.

I rode my bike down Allen Street, asking an officer what happened. He said, fire on grand street. When I got to Broome, a nice officer who was probably just tired yelled at me not to go that way. I told him I lived down Allen, and he said, too bad. I said, how should I go? He said, I don't know, but not this way. So I shimmied over to the other side of Allen and rode my bike down the middle of the road in the wrong direction. There were no cars coming, the entire street was blocked off by fire trucks. As I got to Grand, I saw huge plumes of smoke coming out of the top of the building and I saw people with pets who looked haggard and tired, talking to cops. 

I used to live literally across from where the fire was, and currently live in an apartment building just a few blocks from where the huge fire was last night. I witnessed a fire a few months ago that took a building near East Broadway and Allen and decimated the Hong Kong Market where I used to go to get sushi rice and good produce. 

Seeing each of these fires returned me for a moment to one of my worst nightmares -- that someday I'll be riding my bike home, see a few fire trucks, get closer and notice that where my cozy home used to be is now a giant onion ring cave with swirls of smoke peeling off of it. Some people in my mostly Chinese inhabited building burn paper in the hallways as some sort of spiritual ritual and a few times fire trucks have come because people reported smelling smoke. I exasperatedly ignore it when I smell the smoke,  because I know what it is since I've been there for years, but it's kind of a boy who cried wolf scenario. One day I'll smell smoke and think it's just the rituals, but in fact, the building will be on fire. 

Man o man, this is a sad story, I will try to volunteer to help in whatever way I can, encourage others to do the same, and will take a moment now to be appreciative for what I have.

OK that moment is now over, and I return to my normal life where I wish I had more than I did. 

MY GUY, RON KUBY

I really dig this cat, Ron Kuby. He's a lawyer who defends the little guy. He once walked out on a case I was peripherally unfortunately involved in -- defending the little guy doesn't include defending would-be histrionic nut jobs. We remain on good terms and I will definitely hire him again if I ever run into any future trouble. Let's hope I am done dating maniacs. 

Kuby pops up every now and then to rain on some idiotic tough guy's parade, often times some fat cat involved in city shenanigans. This time, he's defending Billy's Antiques and Props, you know the joint, the lean-to curio shop on the corner of Elizabeth and Houston, just spitting distance from Tom & Jerry's bar. The place with tons of dressers and chairs lining the side walk which catch my eye every time I ride by on my bike. 

i wonder if his business card says "handsome professional butt kicker"

Seems Billy Leroy is in big trubs for selling subway signage without a permit. 

Billy, who was arrested last month over the fandango,  maintains his innocence, stating he purchased the signs from a fella he was in good with who was supposed to just trash the things after they were taken out of service. Tossing those cool old relics into the garbage -- now, that would have been a crime. 

Leroy hits court June 16th. If you wanna see something amazing, which is Mr. Ron Kuby at work, be there!

If you see something, leave something

EXPAND YOUR KNOWLEDGE: 

RACKED: Where to buy subway signs, NY Times City Blog, Ron Kuby's Wiki Page

MOBY celebrates one year of sobriety

Moby cites the Lower East Side as part of his past troubles, without actually calling it out. He states, "The problem is living downtown. Between my house and my recording studio, there'd be 37 bars." Some downtowners may say it sounds like a personal problem, as few in this hood can throw an empty in any direction out their front door without hitting a bar right in its' distressed metal facade. Somehow, surely, many Lower East Side residents still manage to get in bed at a reasonable hour.

Plus, isn't that sorta what the rock 'n roll lifestyle is all about?


Regardless, congrats Moby, here's to many more booze free, sleep filled nights. (Though doesn't booze actually help sleep come on more quickly at times?)

Lower East Sider Survey Qs: 

Are there too many bars in the Lower East Side? 

What time do you usually get to bed?